As a side effect of divorce, many divorced couples no longer get along or want to speak with one another. Unfortunately, when they have children together, they may not have a choice.
As someone who wants to do what is best for your child, one of the things you should look into is how to build back up your relationship with the other parent. You don’t have to be friends or lovers, but being able to have a strong parenting relationship is a key to reducing conflicts and helping raise your child in the most positive manner possible.
Starting a better co-parenting relationship
When you have to share child custody, you do want to have a good co-parenting relationship. A good co-parenting relationship has:
- Clear boundaries about when you contact each other, how you speak to one another and what you should do in certain situations, such as emergencies or when disciplining your child
- Flexibility, so that while a routine is maintained, both parents respect that life is not predictable and that flexibility may be needed in some circumstances
- A good, predetermined schedule that keeps you and the other parent on the same page with drop-off and pick-up times.
- No manipulation. Both parents are honest with each other to work through issues
If you don’t get along with your ex-spouse but want to build a better co-parenting relationship, consider setting up a time to talk to them about it. Express that you are willing to be flexible and will remain respectful as long as they treat you in the same way. Be realistic, and know when to let go of anger or frustration.
What should you do if your co-parent is still causing problems?
If the other parent is causing problems, trying to manipulate your custody schedule or creating other kinds of issues, it’s important to know your legal rights. You may be able to seek a change in your custody schedule or ask that your child is supervised while with the other parent. You may have the option of taking the other parent back to court to address your concerns, as well.